A good DJ is like a good fuck. Builds you up... teases you a little... makes you think the BAM is going to come... but no. Then, when you least expect it, when you're so hot and bothered and you've been let down by all the crescendo without an actual BAM, just when you think the DJ will keep being a fucking cocktease manipulitive bitch, he HITS YOU WITH THE MOST INTENSE CRESCENDO-GASM YOU'VE EVER HEARD and everyone's jumping in time with each other, and the fire-spinners and lightshow artists are spinning in time with the music, and everyone just connects in this beautiful space as the sun is rising.
jello~ my name is shelly, but my raver friends knew me as jellybean. i used to hate it. my myspace name was "shellybean" and i felt that the person who gave me the nickname was being super cheap with it and not giving it much thought. i never thought it would be the year 2021 and i would continue to use "jelly" in some form as a nickname. shelly. jelly. jellybean. jaybee. jaybles. one half of jellybob.
i feel really lucky and blessed that i got to experience raving in the timeline that i did. the main stream had not caught onto edm yet, so our parties truly felt like our own freaky getaway at the end of every week. we still map point parties, where you wouldn't get the directions to the party until the night of, and after you drove to a certain location. the directions could contain things like 'reset your odometer and when you hit x miles, turn right.' our parties were out in the desert, in the forest, or at random (sometimes illegally entered) warehouses in downtown los angeles. the music was loud, the lights were flashing and my friends were some of the most colorful people in the room.
i wish i could of been a little more present in those moments but you don't know you're making the memories of your lifetime when you're living them. i cherish those nights i spent dancing under the moon. i would not be the person i am today without those few years when i was just becoming a young adult. they were truly the best days of my life.

css by nico (rabbitguns) / background from transparenttextures ("absurdity")

Our emotional state of choice is Ecstasy. Our nourishment of choice is Love. Our addiction of choice is technology. Our religion of choice is music. Our currency of choice is knowledge. Our politics of choice is none. Our society of choice is utopian though we know it will never be. You may hate us. You may dismiss us. You may misunderstand us. You maybe unaware of our existence. We can only hope you do not care to judge us, because we would never judge you. We are not criminals. We are not disillusioned. We are not drug addicts. We are not naive children...We are one massive, global, tribal village that transcends man-made law, physical geography, and time itself. We are The Massive. One Massive.
We were first drawn by the sound. From far away, the thunderous, muffled, echoing beat was comparable to a mother's heart soothing a child in her womb of concrete, steel, and electrical wiring. We were drawn back into this womb, and there, in the heat, dampness, and darkness of it... We came to accept that we are all equal. Not only to the darkness, and to ourselves, but to the very music slamming into us and passing through our souls: we are all equal.
And somewhere around 35 Hz we could feel the hand of God at our backs, pushing us forward, pushing us to push ourselves to strengthen our minds, our bodies, and our spirits. Pushing us to turn to the person beside us to join hands and uplift them by sharing the uncontrollable joy we felt from creating this magical bubble that can, for one evening, protect us from the horrors, atrocities, and pollution of the outside world. It is in that very instant, with these initial realisations that each of us was truly born.
We continue to pack our bodies into clubs, or warehouses, or buildings you've abandoned and left for naught, and we bring life to them for one night. Strong, throbbing, vibrant life in it's purest, most intense, most hedonistic form. In these makeshift spaces, we seek to shed ourselves of the burden of uncertainty for a future you have been unable to stabilise and secure for us. We seek to relinquish our inhibitions, and free ourselves from the shackle's and restraints you've put on us for your own peace of mind.
We seek to re-write the programming that you have tried to indoctrinate us with since the moment we were born. Programming that tells us to hate, that tells us to judge, that tells us to stuff ourselves into the nearest and most convenient pigeon hole possible. Programming that even tells us to climb ladders for you, jump through hoops, and run through mazes and on hamster wheels. Programming that tells us to eat from the shiny silver spoon you are trying to feed us with, instead of nourish ourselves with our own capable hands. Programming that tells us to close our minds, instead of open them.
Until the sun rises to burn our eyes by revealing the dis-utopian reality of a world you've created for us, we dance fiercely with our brothers and sisters in celebration of our life, of our culture, and of the values we believe in: Peace, Love, Freedom, Tolerance, Unity, Harmony, Expression, Responsibility and Respect.
Our enemy of choice is ignorance. Our weapon of choice is information. Our crime of choice is breaking and challenging whatever laws you feel you need to put in place to stop us from celebrating our existence. But know that while you may shut down any given party, on any given night, in any given city, in any given country or continent on this beautiful planet, you can never shut down the entire party. You don't have access to that switch, no matter what you may think. The music will never stop. The heartbeat will never fade. The party will never end.

i am a raver and this is my manifesto.


july 1st - misse's big adventure
july 14th - primal trance
august 5th - return to harmony 2
september 2nd - nocturnal wonderland
october 13th - raveolution
october 14th - frooty loops 2
october 20th - childs play
october 28th - monster massive
november 4th - kandieland 3
december 2nd - winterfresh
december 16th - jolly raver

right click, open in new tab to view in full size.


january 6th - 1up
january 13th - preset
january 20th - shake like an earthquake
january 27th - connected 3
february 17th - rescue ravers
april 6th - kandie randie's birthday
april 13th - kingdom heartcore
may 12th - binary history
may 19th - miles of smiles
june 8th - homebass
june 30th - electric daisy carnival
august 4th - voices from the underground
august 10th - homebass 2
september 2nd - funtrip
september 8th - cybertron
september 14th - homebass 3
september 19th - lovefest
october 6th - pre-raveolution
october 19th - pound puppies
november 3rd - oogie boogie
november 8th - free raveolution
november 17th - soup kitchen of manifestation
december 1st - winterfresh
december 31st - liquid nye

right click, open in new tab to view in full size.

2008 and beyond

january 20th - homebass returns
february 2nd - mardi gras 4
february 17th - happy love
march 22nd - jump!
march 29th - 50/50
april 5th - fresh anniversary
may 17th - miles of smiles
june 28th - electric daisy carnival
august 23rd - fresh squeezed
september 20th - beyond the beat
october 4th - love fest
jan 31 2009 - plur 6
oct 18 2014 - htid la
oct 7 2016 - stimulate launch
dec 2 2016 - stimulate 2
feb 18 2017 - love stimulation
april 7 2017 - ravers reunion
july 28 2017 - ravers reunion 2

right click, open in new tab to view in full size.

i am also so very grateful to the rave photographers and their cameras for capturing all of these memories on film and hosting them online for a decade afterwards. here are some of my favorite photos from our infamous nights out (without exposing anybody). right click, view in new tab for larger photos.


i raved in the generation that didn't really have smart phones, and our cameras that we did have access to could not film the party that well. plus all of the videos have been on youtube for more than a decade now so they look pretty bad.

My Favorite Songs

Here are some of my favorite happy hardcore tracks.
the spark (t4tsuya remix) - scott brown, m-project
i will pick you up - s3rl, tamika
timebomb (al storm remix) - clsm, lisa abbott
taking me back (kutski & darren styles) - sound rush, kutski, darren styles
2 bad 2 rude (original mix) - al storm
wonderwall - ganar, dimension
if i were you - ganar, dimension
timebomb (cube::hard remix) - clsm, lisa abbott
ordinary people - dougal, gammer
definition of a bad boy - scott brown
genre police - s3rl, lexi
feel the melody - s3rl
friendzoned - s3rl, mixie moon
r4v3 b0y - s3rl, krystal
i'll see you again - s3rl, chichi
angel eyes (vagabond vip) - brisk, ham
how far i'll go - da tweekaz
float away - dougal, gammer
fly away (hixxy mix) - visa
dreams come true (ultravibes remix) - neoclubber
surrender (hardcore adrenaline mix) - al storm, army
on a high - dougal, mickey skeedale
like a rainbow (chris unknown remix) - re-con, demand
come with me (ste ingham remix) - special d
beneath the lights (darren styles remix) - molly
when i close my eyes (darren styles remix) - dougal, gammer
freak - re-con, klubfiller
just be - technikore
right here right now 2011 (technikore remix) - re-con
control (squad-e & klubfiller) - squad-e, cat d
all that i need - s3rl, kayliana
planet rave - s3rl, renee
#yeet - technikore, jts
we killed the rave - gammer, whizzkid
choke - al storm x my3r5
ravers mashup - s3rl


Kandi kids in Los Angeles were something else. We dressed in fuzzy pants, with 60"+ leg openings. Stuffed animals bounced around our necks as we jumped in time to the music, and we had plastic beads up to our shoulders. Here are some photos from my personal collection.

External Links

Websites, past and present, that were important to the California rave scene when I was partying.
My LA rave flyers album 1999-2005
My LA rave flyers album 2006 forward
Rave Preservation Project
Nocturnal Wonderland site archive
Electric Daisy Carnival archive

other links, news articles, stories etc that i find important to the archival of our moments in time, either shared by my generation, or the previous ones

These Photos Tell the Forgotten Story of LA's Latinx Rave Scene in the 90s - We talk to Map Pointz founder Guadalupe Rosales about the party crews that gave teens a sense of belonging beyond gang culture.
'Why Don't We All Go Bonkers?' – The Rise and Fall of Happy Hardcore - DJs, producers and the scene's major players tell the full story of dance music's most divisive genre.

documetaries and important videos

Better Living Through Circuitry
The Last Dance
The Untold Story of American Rave Fliers
Anabolic Frolic the Hullabaloo Experience
Hullabaloo: View to a Thrill
American Massive
Small Town Ecstasy
Under the Electric Sky